so necessary in this day and time you should also have a secret word that only thoes few that you trust in your inter circle and your children know your child can ask for the secret word ian if the person doesnot know it then you didn’t send him or her and change your secret word as it becomes nedessary and rember that some of the most dangerous people could be one of your relatives the favorite uncle or ant that always has a suprise that touching were a bathingsuit does not cober is inapropate and that your child should tell yall my son’s mean man was his godfather this went on several years befor he finaly told his godfather was not a stranger not all dangerous people are strangers

so necessary. unfortunately.

On a related topic, you may have read the study (discussed in Gavin DeBecker’s excellent book, “Protecting the Gift”) that found one particular thing children could do if they ever found themselves in the position of needing help — to ask a WOMAN for help as soon as possible. This proved to be safer than asking a security guard, or older child, or a man in uniform (small children, in particular, often confuse police uniforms with other uniforms) or waiting for someone to offer them help. That last one is statistically the most dangerous, because predators leap on exactly that sort of situation. This important tip is critical to teach children, because even the most attentive parents can lose track of a child momentarily, or the parent him/herself could be temporarily incapacitated, requiring the child to seek help…

Heather,

I am with you 1000%. I’ve NEVER put my children in the church nursery without me staying in there with them. Not even if I know the nursery worker well. You just never know what could happen in there. My mind runs too wild to be able to concentrate on a sermon with my children away from me. I truly believe the children should grow up worshiping alongside us.

A small mom to mom heart talk: I’m terrified of something happening to my daughter (16 mos). We live in a city with no family and no friends. We stopped going to our church for several reasons, one was that they kept urging (in that sickeningly sweet way)us to put our DD in the nursery. We are very against that as Jesus said “let the little children come to me” not “hide them in the nursery closet”. I’m not sure if I’m just paranoid and need to trust Him more, or if I am right in being overprotective, I don’t know those ppl! I wouldn’t hand them my wallet to take care of, why would I give them my child?

Cool blog! I also have wrestled with this issue with my 3 and 4 year old girls. I want them to be friendly and confident with strangers rather than fear them. At the same time, I want them to learn boundaries and how to say “No!” I have a hard time emphasizing stranger danger because I had a bad experience with a male babysitter as a child (someone my parents were paying to keep me safe!) and I know many women who have had scary experiences with uncles, grandfathers, clergy etc. I try to teach my kids what kinds of behavior are acceptable, stranger or not, but I have not emphasized strangers being any more or less dangerous than anyone else. I hope it works… I am glad God is sovereign over my sloppy attempts at raising his precious children!